Daily Joke: Your shoes are on the wrong feet

Dec 12, 2021
Not on the wrong feet, but definitely mismatched! Source: Getty Images

Me: You’re shoes are on the wrong feet.

4yo:

Me:

4yo:

Me:

4yo: I don’t have any other feet.

Me: Fair enough.

———-

A lady goes into a bar and sees a cowboy with his feet propped up on a table. He has the biggest feet she’s ever seen. The woman asks the cowboy if what they say about men with big feet is true.

The cowboy replies, “Sure is, why don’t you come back to my place and let me prove it?”

The woman is curious, so she spends the night with him. When she sees him the next day, she hands the cowboy a $100 bill.

“I’m flattered,” he says, blushing. “Nobody has ever paid me for my prowess before.”

“Well, don’t be,” the woman replies. “Take this money and go buy yourself some boots that fit!”

———-

A suspected COVID-19 male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. A young female nurse appears and gives him a partial sponge bath.

“Nurse,” he mumbles from behind the mask, “are my testicles black?”

Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, “I don’t know, Sir. I’m only here to wash your upper body and feet.”

He struggles to ask again, “Nurse, please check for me. Are my testicles black?”

Concerned that he might elevate his blood pressure and heart rate from worrying about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and pulls back the covers. She raises his gown, holds his manhood in one hand and his testicles gently in the other. She looks very closely and says, “There’s nothing wrong with them Sir. They look fine.”

The man slowly pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her, and says very slowly, “Thank you very much. That was wonderful. Now listen to me very, very closely:

Are – my – test – results – back?”

Need another laugh? Have a look at some of our other great jokes here.

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