This guy goes into a pet shop looking for a bird. The shopkeeper brings him to a cage and tells him, “You won’t believe what this parrot can do. His name is Chess and he’s wonderfully talented. His songs will blow your mind. I’m selling him for only $10,000.”
“That’s pretty steep,” he replies. “What’s so amazing about these songs?”
“Well, he sings Christmas carols on demand. Watch this, if I hold a match under his left foot …”
The shopkeeper lights a match and holds it under the parrots left foot, and it starts singing, “Deck the halls with boughs of holly, fa la la la la …”
“He’s pretty good!” says the man.
“That’s not all, if I hold a match under his right foot …”
“Siiiilent niiiggghtt … hooooly niiiiggght,” sings the parrot.
“Wow, what a great voice,” remarks the man. “But what if you hold the match between his feet?”
The parrot squawks, “Chess nuts roasting on an open fiiiiirrrre …”