How to keep or rekindle the romance in your relationship

When we baby boomers were young, we didn’t recognise Valentine’s Day.  But it’s now an important date on the calendar.  However, ust because we didn’t celebrate in our youth, doesn’t mean we can’t start celebrating this important date now!    

If you think your relationship has gone stale, well why not think about putting a bit of spark back into it! It doesn’t matter if you have been married for 50 years or just recently entered into a relationship, and the beauty of it is, it doesn’t have to cost the earth!

It can be as easy as sending or dropping a card on the breakfast or dinner table of your partner and wishing them a happy Valentine’s Day. Even if you just say those magic words that you may not have said in a loooong time – ‘I Love You’. Sometimes we forget we are in a relationship, particularly if you are both retired; you do your own thing, you see each other every day. What is that saying? ‘Same thing different day’. 

Getting the spark back in your relationship doesn’t have to be just on Valentine’s Day. If you are like me and grumpy in the morning, maybe it’s time to change, it’s never too late to put that spark and the smile back on your face.  

Let’s remember, because of Covid-19, we have lost two years of our life. It’s time to take back control and enjoy the rest of the time we have with our partner, whether it be long or short.

Yes, Covid-19 is still on our minds but we can still do things, go places and stay safe.  Think about going into your capital city to stay the night, go out for dinner or a show – it can all be done safely.

Or you could even organise a special event or travel back in time and go down memory lane.  Can you visit where you first met (if it hasn’t been torn down like mine!) or where you had your first date?  If you don’t like going out in the evening, go somewhere special for lunch, better still what about a high tea? You may say you won’t have anything to talk about, well take some old photos of when you were young – talk over ‘the good old days’ – photos of holidays are a great way of reliving your travels and special times together.

A romantic way to get that spark back is a cruise, but that’s not going to happen in Australia for many months so what is the alternative?  What about a day train trip? In Victoria, they have the Q train where you can wine and dine in the Dining Car or enjoy private dining in first class.  Most states have ferries. You can spend the day ‘cruising’ and talking to each other as you did when you were dating.

What about making a new ‘tradition’ such as a weekly date night (or lunch)?  This is the night you go out for dinner together; it could just be to the local pub for a meal but it is just the two of you.

Just because we are ‘seniors’ we can still enjoy a massage, give each other a massage or be indulgent and go and splurge on a massage together!

Then there are just the simple things in life – a hug or cuddle sitting on the couch watching your favourite movie.  Our days of drinking Porphyry Pearl & Mateus have long gone, so get out a bottle of bubbly, your favourite red wine or make cocktails!

Make that effort of saying ‘good morning’ surprise your partner with a cup of tea in bed.  Better still both of you have a cup of tea/coffee in bed and talk. Whether you discuss how you are going to spend the day either doing solo activities, or with each other, a conversation is a lovely place to start.

It really is the little things that can bring you both closer together again such as really listening to each other and responding.  At the end of the day sit on the verandah and share a wine with each other and talk about what you did during the day and enjoy the peace, quiet and closeness of the many years you have been together.