How to lose a dress size in 14 days

I’m 60 years old with average to good health. A sweet tooth and lover of cheese.

When my partner recently headed off on a two-week business trip overseas, I decided to do a home makeover on myself. Partially as a surprise for him, but also as a present to myself for turning 61 in September, the day he flew home.

And, even more importantly, to fit into a much-loved dress for my birthday dinner with friends and family.

Covid, having scuppered my 60^th celebrations, we had booked a swanky restaurant to mark the “end of” my 60^th year instead of the beginning!

I planned my efforts meticulously. In much the same way, I planned the early days of my three pregnancies. I am, it appears, harbouring borderline ADHD tendencies.

Or, maybe in another age, I just like to do things properly (the caveat being I OFTEN fail).

If you’re like me, I suggest listening to Brene Brown and her sisters’ podcast one day on The Gifts of Imperfection. I listened to it with my also perfectionist youngest daughter. Very informative and funny.

But, back to losing a dress size in fourteen days!

And before I go on, I am presuming with our audience, I don’t need to give a health warning.

We ALL know that the sensible way to diet/eat/live is with moderation and not ridiculous dietary or exercise ideas.

However, occasionally needs must!

Some of us here will be getting ready for our children’s weddings (mine sadly all live in “sin” or still haven’t left home!).

Others, like me, have post-menopausal weight gain that seems impossible to lose. Or, perhaps just like food (and wine) too much and have a celebration to look forward to.

I planned with military precision my fourteen days. Worked out my menus; five days of very low calories, two days slightly more.

I dived into my numerous recipe and fitness/wellness books to find nutritious food for the fortnight.

I told myself that wine was worthless (although normally enjoyable) calories.

And I was going to have to move my body a great deal to pull this off!

DAY ONE

With trepidation, I stand on the scales. I don’t really need to. After years of gaining and losing 5kgs throughout my life, I know to more or less to a decimal point what I weigh.

And yes, the same old unwanted number raises its ugly head again. It always feels slightly demonic when I see those numbers including a lot of sixes – isn’t 666 the mark of the devil?

The following fortnight included a healthy nutritious green smoothie each morning, and then small meals lunch and early evening of good food.

You know what I mean by good food.

I didn’t cut out food groups, did eat carbs after 5 pm but not long after as I’m often in bed by 8 pm (up at 5 am) – and as I sleep/wake most nights, bedtime is becoming somewhat irrelevant to me in many ways.

I went to the gym six days out of seven during those two weeks. Which I feel was impressive!

On top of my usual bobbing around in Aquarobics, maintaining strength in Body Pump, Pilates and relaxing in Yin yoga – I added in walking on the treadmill for 30 minutes each gym visit. And took the dogs for a 30-minute yomp each morning.

Rain or shine. Yes, as I say. Impressive.

I popped on my headphones and listened to inspiring podcasts, uplifting happy music and Ted Talks during much of this activity.

This is not a regime I could keep up at this pace, long term, of course.

I work out of the house, a couple of days a week, and those days did require some organisation and effort but, I felt it was worth it.

I booked my first facial since pre-pandemic days, scheduled for two days before the partner came home (I am aware I am sounding a little like a fifties housewife, but this was just as much for my sense of self-worth as it was for him).

I also booked myself in for a massage.  This was on the basis that if I stuck to my plan, it was a reward for all my efforts.

DAY TWELVE

Feeling slightly fab, not weighing till day 14.  Massage at 1 pm. Well done you (I like to think that self-care and praise is a useful tool in our sense of wellbeing).

DAY FOURTEEN

Weight. Almost on target.

A loss of a few kilos. And I think a dress size. And I feel about ten years younger. My bras fit again and yes, most importantly, I can zip up my special birthday dress bought for my 60^th.

All in all, a result!

Of course, I will be trying to “maintain” (or simply buy bigger dress sizes in future) but for now, feeling pleased with myself and will enjoy it while it lasts!

Back to the old routine, of exercise and healthy eating. Less of it though. Exercise that is, the healthy eating I do try to follow.

Very happy to open the vino and have a glass with dinner again. At last!

Along with enjoying the odd (have no idea how many calories laden) beautiful cheese that I love. And my beloved dark (good for you) chocolate.

Will I do it again? Yes definitely, but if any family member is reading this, I am more than open to being gifted a visit to a health farm, for pampering and food preparation and general being looked after instead of my do-it-yourself fortnight next year.

Now that really would be a result!

IMPORTANT LEGAL INFO This article is of a general nature and FYI only, because it doesn’t take into account your personal health requirements or existing medical conditions. That means it’s not personalised health advice and shouldn’t be relied upon as if it is. Before making a health-related decision, you should work out if the info is appropriate for your situation and get professional medical advice.