Funny saying for seniors

I love corny sayings. And as we age, we have to remember to laugh at ourselves.

Here are a few that might come in handy for you:

Although I broke my humerus, I hope I’m still funny.

Did you hear the story about Paul Bunyan? He woke up one morning, and he had had hammer toes.

Although she has cataracts, she still has insight.

No matter how much she ironed, her face was still as wrinkled as a prune.

I’m trying to find balance in my life. That’s why I don’t stand on one foot.

Not everything is black and white except nuns, dice, and dominos.

I lost any chance of wisdom when my molars were pulled.

When I bite off more than I can chew, I’m glad I wear my dentures.

Where did I put my glasses? There, they are in the cupboard right next to the coffee cups.

Why can’t the mute button work on certain people?

Did my Tesla tell me to give up driving?

The other day, a man told me to give him all my dough. So I handed him a loaf of bread.

Why does every shopping cart at Walmart roll like it has arthritis?

Who invented the Rotary Intersection?

I just started wearing bifocals. Now, I can go both ways.

I thought binary had something to do with math.

The sign said, “self-check out.” So I took off my top, and I gave myself a breast exam.

Don’t wear light-colored pants if you are incontinent.

Yesterday morning, a driver cut me off on the freeway, so I gave him my early bird special.

Monkey see, monkey doo doo. That’s why I prefer to watch them at the zoo.

Sometimes, I want to play Candy Land.

Why don’t you try spelling “thingamajig” this time?

No, QRSSVT is not a scrabble word.

Thankfully, I can still tie my shoes.

Star Wars is what happens when too many actors audition for the same part.

Does Labor Day also apply to pregnant women?

What’s ChatGPT?

Is the Dewey Decimal System a political term?

Have you seen my doohickey?

Eat, drink, and be Mary. That applies to me.