A young man was having some money problems and needed $200 to get his car fixed, but had run out of people to borrow from.
So, he called his parents via the operator, reversed the charge and said to his father: “I need to borrow $200.”
At the other end, his father answered: “Sorry, I can’t hear you, son, I think there may be a bad line.”
The boy shouted back: “Two hundred. I need two hundred dollars!”
“Sorry, I still can’t hear you clearly,” said his father.
Suddenly, the operator cut in: “Sorry to butt in, but I can hear him perfectly clearly.”
“Good, the father replied. “Then you send him the money!”
An old man is walking down the street when he sees a young boy sitting in front of a sweet shop, shoving lollies in his mouth as fast as possible.
The man walks up to the boy and says: “You know son, it’s really not healthy to eat all that sugar.”
The kid looks up at him and says: “You know my grandfather lived to be 97 years old.”
The man replies: “Oh and did he eat a lot of sugar?”
The kid looks at him and says: “No. He minded his own business.”
After months of noticing a certain trend, the good-natured boss was compelled to call his worker into his office.
“It has not escaped my attention,” he pointed out. “That every time there’s a home game at the stadium, you have to take your aunt to the doctor.”
“You know you’re right, sir,” exclaimed the worker in shock. “I didn’t realise it. You don’t suppose she’s faking, do you?”