Bob was a contestant on Who Wants to Be A Millionaire. He had finally made it to the last round and the million dollar question. The night before the big question, he told the host that he wanted a question on Australian history.
When the big night arrived, Bob made his way on stage in front of the studio and TV audience. He had become the talk of the week. He was the best guest this show had ever seen. The host stepped up to the mic.
“Bob, you have chosen Australian history as your final question. You know that if you correctly answer this question, you will walk away $1,000,000 dollars richer. Are you ready?”
Bob nodded with a cocky confidence and the crowd went nuts. He hadn’t missed a question all week.
“Bob, your question on Australian history is a two-part question. As you know, you may answer either part first. As a rule, the second half of the question is always easier. Which part would you like to take a stab at first?”
Bob was now becoming more noticeably nervous. He couldn’t believe it, but he was drawing a blank. Australian history was his easiest subject, but he played it safe. “I’ll try the easier part first.”
The host nodded approvingly. “Here we go Bob. I will ask you the second half first, then the first half.”
The audience silenced with gross anticipation.
“Bob, here is your question: And in what year did it happen?”
A doctor and a lawyer were attending a cocktail party when the doctor was approached by a man who asked for advice on how to handle his ulcer. The doctor mumbled some medical advice, then turned to the lawyer and remarked: “I never know how to handle the situation when I’m asked for medical advice during a social function. Is it acceptable to send a bill for such advice?”
The lawyer replied that it was certainly acceptable to do so.
The next day, the doctor sent the ulcer-stricken man a bill. The lawyer also sent one to the doctor.
Upon entering the little country store, the stranger noticed a sign saying ‘DANGER! BEWARE OF DOG!’ posted on the glass door. Inside he noticed a harmless old hound dog asleep on the floor besides the cash register.
He asked the store manager: “Is that the dog folks are supposed to beware of?”
“Yep, that’s him,” he replied.
The stranger couldn’t help but be amused. “That certainly doesn’t look like a dangerous dog to me. Why in the world would you post that sign?”
“Because,” the owner replied. “Before I posted that sign, people kept tripping over him.”
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