A police officer sees a man driving around with a pickup truck full of penguins. He pulls the guy over and says: “You can’t drive around with penguins in this town! Take them to the zoo immediately.”
The guy obliges and drives away.
The next day, the officer sees the same guy driving around with the truck full of penguins again. This time, though, all the penguins are wearing sunglasses.
The police officer pulls the guy over and says: “I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo yesterday?”
The guy replies: “I did, and today I’m taking them to the beach.”
A dog owner walks up to a neighbour’s property. He approaches a man and asks: “Is the dog at the entrance yours?”
“Yes,” the neighbour replied.
“I’m sorry, but my Chihuahua has killed your Great Dane,” said the man.
“Impossible! Have you seen the size of my dog?!” the neighbour replied.
The man nodded and said: “Precisely. My chihuahua is stuck in your dog’s throat.”
A man drives deep into the forest to get rid of his cat. He lets her out at an abandoned place.
After one hour he gets a phone call from his wife: “The cat is back.”
The man growls: “Okay, can you put her on, I got lost and need directions.”