As we power on through our senior years and begin to reflect on the accomplishments and trials of our lives, we inevitably turn to the key question that will ultimately define our legacy – Am I a Dag?
The issue, of course, is not so much whether you are a dag but just how big a dag you are.
To assist you in this noble quest, here is a quick, friendly quiz scientifically designed to determine the definitive answer to this pressing issue.
The quiz consists of 25 YES/NO questions. Some of them are confronting. Take as long as you need to complete it.
Every YES is worth four points. (See table below for your dag rating.)
HOW DID YOU RATE?
0-20: You are a Minimal Dag – You stand little to no risk of ever being seen wearing moccasins while shopping.
21-40: You are a Moderate Dag – Occasionally you will try teaching your dog to bark in time to a song.
41-60: You are a Medium Dag – Your favourite indoor game is still Monopoly.
61-80: You are a Serious Dag – You own every episode of Star Trek on VHS.
81-100: You are a Complete Dag – Congratulations. You can wear a lampshade for laughs and think you are the king of comedy. Everyone around you might think you’re a fool but you don’t care. Nothing can touch you now.