A Kung Fu student asks his teacher: “Master, why does my ability not improve? I’m always defeated.”
The master, pensive and forever patient, answers: “My dear pupil, have you seen the gulls flying by the setting sun and their wings seeming like flames?”
“Yes, my master, I have.”
“And a waterfall, spilling over the stones without taking anything out of its proper place?”
“Yes, my master, I have witnessed it.”
“And the moon, when it touches the calm water to reflect all its enormous beauty?”
“Yes, my master, I have also seen this marvellous phenomenon.”
“That is the problem. You keep watching all this stuff instead of training.”
A young lady was a theatre learner applying for acting classes. At the end of the busy day she went back to her room and entered in a huff of anger.
“What’s wrong?” asked her roommate.
“Well, all the acting classes are filled. I couldn’t even get into Mime class.”
“Why not?”
“How should I know? You can’t get a word out of those people!”
Three men are stranded on a desert island. One day they find a magic lamp containing a genie, who grants them each one wish.
The first man wishes he was off the island and back home.
The second man wishes the same.
The third man says: “I’m lonely. I wish my friends were back here.”