Daily Joke: A man came home to find his wife with her bags packed

May 14, 2020
He pondered that then went into the house and packed his bags and returned to the porch and with his wife. Source: Pexels.

A man came home from work one day to find his wife sitting on the front porch with her bags packed. He asked her where she was going and she replied: “I’m going to Las Vegas”.

He questioned her as to why she was going and she told him: “I just found out that I can make $400 a night doing what I give you for free”.

He pondered that then went into the house and packed his bags and returned to the porch and with his wife. She said: “And just where do you think you’re going?”

“I’m going too!” he replied.

“Why?” She asked.

“I want to see how you are going to live on $800 a year!”

Some tourists asked a security guard a question

Some tourists in the Museum of Natural History are marvelling at the dinosaur bones. One of them asks the guard: “Can you tell me how old the dinosaur bones are?”

The guard replies: “They are 3 million, four years and six months old”.

“That’s an awfully exact number,” replies the tourist. “How do you know their age so precisely?”

The guard answers: “Well, the dinosaur bones were three million years old when I started working here, and that was four and a half years ago.”

A passenger tapped his driver on the shoulder

The passenger tapped the cab driver on the shoulder to ask him something. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the sidewalk and stopped centimetres from a shop window.

For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver said: “Look mister, don’t ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me!”

The passenger apologised and said he didn’t realise that a little tap could scare him so much.

The driver replied: “You’re right. I’m sorry, it’s not really your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver. I’ve been driving a hearse for the last 25 years”.

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