Daily Joke: Caught shoplifting

A woman stole a tin of apricots. Source: Getty Images

A grumpy woman was recently arrested for shoplifting at the local supermarket. During her arrest, she gave everyone a hard time – from the store manager to the security guard, even the arresting officer who escorted her back to the police station.

She made quite a scene, complained and criticised everyone and everything throughout the process.

When she appeared before the court, the magistrate asked her what she had stolen from the supermarket.

“Just a silly can of apricots, you old fool,” she replied defiantly.

When the judge asked why she had done it, the woman replied, “I forgot to bring my purse with me.”

The judge then asked her how many apricots were in the can.

Now the woman was really riled up. “Nine! What’s it to you?”

Patiently, the judge responded. “Madam, I’m going to give you nine days in jail. One day for each apricot.”

As the judge was about to wrap things up, the woman’s husband raised his hand and asked if he might speak.

“Yes sir, what do you have to add?” the judge said.

Confidently, the husband replied, “Your Honour, she also stole two cans of peas.”