A man walks into the barber shop, sits down in the chair and the barber asks: “How do you want your hair cut?”
The man says: “I would like the sideburns one high and one low, a few long hairs sticking out of the back and a few chunks on the side and top.”
The barber looks puzzled and says: “I’m not sure I can do that.”
The customer says: “Why not, you did it that way last time.”
The father of five children had won a toy at a raffle. He called his kids together to ask which one should have the present.
“Who is the most obedient?” he asked. “Who never talks back to mother? Who does everything she says?”
Five small voices answered in unison: “Okay, dad, you get the toy.”
The children were lined up in the eating area of a Catholic primary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples.
The nun wrote out a note which read: “Take only ONE. God is watching.”
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
A child had written a note: “Take all you want. God is watching the apples.