Daily Joke: Whale whale whale, what have we got here?

Two whales on their way to the bar. Source: Getty Images

Two whales are sitting at a bar. The first leans closer to the second and says, “Wooooooo-ahhhhhh-oooo-ahhhh-ahn-ahn-ahn-woooooooo.”

The second whale pushes him back, setting him upright on his stool and grumbles, “Shut up, Frank, you’re drunk!”


What do a group of whales listen to on long journey?



What did the whale eat for lunch?

Fish and Ships.


A teacher was teaching her class about whales. She said that it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human being as even though it was a gigantic animal, its stomach was very small.

A little girl put up her hand and said that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.

Irritated, the teacher insisted that a whale couldn’t possibly swallow a human.

The little girl said, “When I get to Heaven, I’ll ask Jonah.”

The teacher replied, “What if Jonah went to Hell?”

The girl said: “Then you ask him.”


If I hear one more pun about whales …

I’m gonna krill myself.

Stories that matter
Emails delivered daily
Sign up