An Italian father calls his son in London the day before Christmas Eve and says, “I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing.”
“Dad, what are you talking about?” the son yells.
“We can’t stand the sight of each other any longer,” the father says. “We’re sick of each other and I’m sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Spain and tell her.”
The son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone.
“Like heck they’re getting divorced!” she shouts. “I’ll take care of this!”
She calls her father immediately, and yells, “You are not getting divorced. Don’t do a single thing until I get there. I’m calling my brother back, and we’ll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don’t do a thing. Do you hear me?!” and hangs up.
The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. “Sorted! They’re coming for Christmas — and they’re paying their own way.”