A cake walks into a bar and orders a drink.
After a while he notices everyone’s been staring at him since he walked in the door. He asks the barman, “What’s everyone’s problem?”
The barman says, “If I were you I’d get the hell out of here. It looks to me like everyone wants a piece of you!”
“That’s nothing mate”, replies the cake, “I’ve taken on hundreds and thousands before, these guys would be a piece of cake. Their half-baked attempts wouldn’t get a rise out of me. I’m no cupcake, and they’ll be in tiers after I batter those fruitcakes. I think it’s a trifle rude that you’re making cake puns while I’m still here. Call the cops if you like, it’ll be the icing on the cake, I’ve been in custardy before, that’s just the way the cookie crumbles. Just let me finish my drink, I’ll be scone before you know it.”
“I’m sorry”, says the barman, “Thanks for pudding up with me.”