Keep your partner safe from the ‘Ken and Barbie syndrome’, even after you die

They come to us, an ageing couple with death in mind and thoughts aligned.

Theirs is a familiar tale – we want to keep it simple and leave everything to each other and then to the kids. We can do that, I say but, without wanting to rain on your mutual desires, may I raise a delicate subject?

What you want is very common – we call them ‘mirror wills’. But your will is your wish and you can change it anytime you like (usually). At this point, allow me to descend into verse: ‘Mirror mirror on the wall: Will my spouse for love doth fall?’.

The future can be hard to predict except to say one of you will normally die first. The other one could then discover line dancing and meet a later-life love. So enamoured are they with the new set of twinkle toes in their life, they promptly change their will to give everything to the newfound hussy/lothario and disinherit your children.

Most couples at this point of the discussion will turn and peer at each other, not so much longingly, but more malevolently. Some say, “you wouldn’t would you?!” whereas others are heard to mumble “who would want you?!”.

We lawyers call it the Ken and Barbie Syndrome – a fear of what the surviving spouse might ‘get up to’ when the other has gone on their celestial transfer. Most determine it is not a risk which perhaps can be viewed either, at best, as a compliment to each other or, at worst, a scathing assessment of the lack of, shall we call it, marketability of their spouse.

Believe it or not however, for those who take the scenario seriously, the law has mechanisms to address the concern. The most common is a contract. The spouses not only do their mirror wills but we prepare another document to go with their wills called a ‘contract to make a will’. In it they each agree not to change their wills without the consent of the other or their executor.

The law of life and later on is so interesting, isn’t it?

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