Has the penny dropped finally? Have I now grasped the secret of happiness?
Is my life long search for liberation bearing me fruit at last? So, after all, my search has not just been a Don Quixote-like taking on imaginary windmills? So the Satanic Mill is real after all?
And now I can give it a scientific name – it is called the left brain hemisphere!
The one that can analyse but cannot create a single new idea. The one which is linear and rational; it is the world of ‘maya’, or delusions, because real life is never linear and rarely rational. Yet ironically, this delusional brain constantly tries to brainwash me so that I believe that actually, it is the truthful right brain that is the one that creates my delusions. ‘Because life’ – says my left brain – ‘is a hell on Earth.’ This is the reality, and by telling me that life is living bliss rather than a hell, my right brain is deluding me. ‘Don’t believe a word’ it is saying. Because once you awaken from the delusion, you realise that the right brain let you down, you return to realising that the truth is that this is an Orwellian world of hell. You must never think otherwise if you want to face reality rather than trying to escape it. All this talk about bliss is nonsensical self-delusion.
The tyrant that has subjugated my right brain and kept me its slave all these years is my left brain. Now and again my right brain slipped through the Iron Curtain and then I experienced temporary liberation. But the Gestapo of the left brain would always find us and re-tyrannise us.
When I look around the world I realise so many people have given up the hope for liberation: the left brain has simply been too strong for them. It is like the old communist regime – except that the oppressor lives within me, not outside my brain. So, enslavement or liberation comes from inside the brain! And the Goebbels-like Ministry of Truth – that is lies; that constantly right brain-jamming relentless intellectual propaganda emanates from the left brain. It is determined to imprison me in my body, thoughts and my senses and to keep me seeing myself as if I was separate from others.
But how does one get liberation without even being able to identify where the oppression come from; who, or what is the tyrant? At least I know now who is my enemy: it is my dominant left brain that inhibits the operation of my right brain hemisphere and keeps me in darkness. Therefore, if I want to live like an emancipated person I need to permanently overthrow the dictatorship of my left brain. But how did my left brain become my dictator in the first place? How come that it was able to assume this role, in spite of the fact that the right brain is in complete disagreement with its world view? How did this tragedy of self-deception originate? For surely, this is what is meant by falling from Paradise: the Paradise of a dominant right brain.
Now we know that historically Paradise did exist. There was a time when our right brain ruled our lives. When the individual never felt separate from the rest of the world. When it was realised that he/she was like a drop in the ocean, never separate or different, ultimately from all the other drops and the entire ocean. This was life in Paradise, when heaven and earth, the individual and society felt inseparable. Everything belonged to everything else. So how did the ‘I’ delusion concept emerge, and create an illusion of independent existence of the ‘I’ from everything else? When and how did Adam and Eve turn from being conscious of their selves to self-consciousness? From global freedom of illuminated truth the world descended into the global tyranny of Dark Age ignorance. Yet the truth refuses to fight ignorance. It rather goes underground.
At last I realise that the love affair I really searched for all my life was to fall in love with my right brain and to permanently stay in love, instead of falling out of this love so much of the time. For it is in that falling out, that life no longer feels like a Paradise.
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