Something we all need to think about 158



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Last week we ran an article on the marriage between Sir Elton John and his long time partner, David Furnish. The two have been together since 1993 – over 20 years – and have two sons, Zachary and Elijah.

There were very mixed comments on the post. Some people were full of support for the pair that have been together for longer than a large portion of heterosexual relationships but some were unhappy for the couple calling it unnatural and saying they pitied their sons. I personally didn’t have strong feelings either way – I was simply happy for them – until I read another comment. It said, “Why can’t we just be glad that these two children are growing up in a home with two parents that love them?”.

You see, that is the right thing – that children grow up with parents that love them. Sadly, this is becoming less important in so many children’s lives. So why are we quickly to judge and frown upon these relationships when they in some ways are just as natural as heterosexual relationships?

The truth is that we can’t say that it has a negative effect on the development or success of their children because scientifically, that is just not true. There are arguments against same sex marriage that I can understand. The people that say marriage should be saved for a woman and woman, I do understand that.

But I feel that people who say it isn’t good for the children need to know the facts first.

For everyone who believes that children grow up being damaged from having same-sex parents, here’s some information I believe you need to know.

Based on a review of six different studies into the behavioural, psychological and emotional health and development of same sex marriage children, the following was found:

  • Children developed in a “normal” fashion.
  • Children raised by same-sex parents fare equally well to children raised by heterosexual parents.
  • Gay and lesbian adoptive parents in this sample fell into the desirable range of the parenting scale and their children have strength levels equal to or exceeding the scale norms.
  • Children of all family types (including children of same-sex couples) are far more likely to make normal progress through school than are children living in group quarters (such as orphanages and shelters).
  • The 17-year-old daughters and sons of lesbian mothers were rated significantly higher in social, school/academic, and total competence and significantly lower in social problems, rule-breaking, aggressive, and externalising problem behaviour than their age-matched counterparts.

You see, we are so quick to judge and find fault in these relationships but the things we do find aren’t always real.

Tell us, do you think that we need to turn to scientific facts when it comes to the same-sex marriage debate rather than create reasons with no basis for our arguments against it? Share your thoughts in the comments below…

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  1. No matter how scientifically you make it sound or how sweet everything seems in same sex relationships two men cannot conceive a child nor can two women. For some reason it is meant to be a man and a women, mess with that and in the end we will have alsorts of trouble our society.

    4 REPLY
    • I think children growing up in a same sex partnership are wonderful, sensitive & caring children, they are loved, they are cared for & yet a small group in society still look down on this arrangement!! With all that is happening in this world of ours why do some think it is their right to judge others, when we have people slaughtering one another, all in the name of religion. Live & let live, it is not ours to judge.

    • Is it any better a single mum raising 3 kids by 3 different fathers, and the kids never see their fathers, but that would be ok as they have a “mother” and a “father” . kids brought up in a same sex relationship are usually very wanted, and they are loved and nurtured ….

    • Get a life and don’t be so old fashioned.What does it matter as long as the child is loved.

      1 REPLY
    • I suupose you would prefer that children were raised in orphanages like me.What the hell does it matter who the parents are as long as they are loving and caring.

  2. Its alright in case of Elton John who has tons of money, but in the case of a low salary earning couple it can be a harrowing experience.

    6 REPLY
  3. I have gay friends who have been the best friends anyone could ask for. They are what they are just as i am what i am, they accept me and i accept them. Let each live their onw lives. Think about the people out there who are doing harm to others. Dont judge people you dont know.

  4. So true. My daughter and her partner are the best parents. They are the same as my other children and there husband.
    Do not comment on something you don’t know.

  5. If a child has 2 loving parents what does it matter what sex the parents are? Many children are bought up in homes that are single parent situations, one parent has left, those children do well in life if the remaining parent loves and cares for them, so 2 parents ( gay or straight) loving and caring for them would have to have a positive effect. If gay marriage makes some Australian’s happy..then I am all for it

  6. Children who are loved don’t care if their parents are gay or straight..its homophobic heterosexuals who seem to care . Leave gay people alone and get on with your own lives, too many want to live others lives for them..I support gay marriage and no I am NOT gay

    3 REPLY
    • don’t read into it more than is written June, I am a single female and there are a lot of people ready to tag others in here. NO there is nothing wrong with being gay.. news flash..gays are just people like us with a different sexual preference..big bloody deal

    • Leanna, I am in my 70s and utterly agree with you. And to June, is there something really deep down inside wrong with being hetero?

  7. I agree 100% with the report.And yes some people are so quick to judge without know the facts.When I see gay with children i can see so much love in them.The one who oppose gay marriage are most the Catholic church.In my opinion they shouldn’t even say a word against it because they have a big problem with pedophilia priests.

  8. Opinion unfortunately often seems to win over fact, and some parts of the community will hold on to their prejudices regardless of any evidence contradicting what they believe.

  9. When I meet a person I never wonder what sexual preferences they have. I never ask parents I meet are they heterosexual because I do not care. What I do find unacceptable is all the hype and hoo ha attached to celebrities of any persuasion. These people are already under enormous pressure trying to live a normal life so any children of gay unions will not live normally. Their lives will not reflect what a normal Joe Blow couple would live like. Any child of a famous gay couple will have added pressures with extra scrutiny put upon them. One can only hope that gay couples set a better example than “normal” couples who think nothing of putting their children in the lime light and telling the whole world how wonderful they are as parents, only to have nasty custody battles over them when all the glitz and glamour has disappeared.

    3 REPLY
    • Agree wholeheartedly, my son is gay but I think it’s best not to use the word ‘normal’ as it implies that ‘gay’ people are abnormal, which of course they are not.

    • Actually I parenthesized the word “normal”, meaning that I do not think that gays are abnormal. On the contrary I think that peoples perception of “normal” is abnormal. If we all stopped judging others on their sexuality and just got on with worrying about the major issues the world would be a better place.

  10. I am for gay marriage & I am not gay.I believe in equal rights for all people in all areas of life.

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