The pursuit of happiness…are you there yet?

I was born in the only country I know of which affirms the right to pursue happiness. The only problem is, no one ever has explained what happiness really is.

One week ago today was the International Day of Happiness apparently, though I wasn’t aware of it until reading it on Starts at Sixty. Having been born in America, I was raised from a young age knowing these words from the Declaration of Independence: “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness.”

Lots of other people must be pursuing happiness. In addition to a dedicated happiness day, there are at least thirty eight thousand books about happiness on Amazon. So many books tells me are many people in hot pursuit!

But what is this thing called happiness? Is it like art? As in, I don’t know what it is, but I know it when I see it? Is happiness walking around with a smiley face all day? Having been told we have the right to pursue it, how will we know if we have caught it?

Happiness now is just another product to order on line, or to get in “Just Eight (or Ten, Fifteen, Three) Simple Steps!” This leaves many people stressed out that they are missing out on their share of happiness. Perhaps the only ones who find happiness are the authors of the thirty-eight thousand books.

Happiness is, at best, temporary and fleeting; at worst, always out of our reach because we expect it to just fall into our hands if only we follow the right steps. The pursuit of happiness may be a right, but being happy isn’t, and no one, no thing, “makes” us happy.

If truth be told, I’m not happy. However, I am…I’m..hmmm. What, exactly, am I if not “happy”? Let’s see:

I woke up today to find I am alive, as is my loving wife. I feel healthy and fit, and there are no serious illnesses amongst my family and friends. I could stop there and feel great!

I am in regular, physical contact with friends and spend time with them eating, drinking, laughing and, when the time comes, crying.

The best insight for me and maybe for you can be found in the comics: “Happiness is anyone or anything that’s loved by you.” Charlie Brown, in the late, great Charles Schulz’s Peanuts.

I have just planted new climbers in my garden and am enjoying a slice of freshly baked bread which came out of my oven. I hosed out our rubbish bin this morning and it is no longer smelly. I just finished reading an excellent book and am well into another.

I have started volunteering as a teacher aide in a school where the majority of students are from overseas. Soon I will start helping an adult migrant with English.

I spoke to my sister in New Jersey on Skype this morning and saw that her infected finger is getting better. My five-year-old granddaughter has learned twenty new words at school, her three year old sister is putting together longer and longer sentences, and my grandson helped me make scones last weekend and then enjoyed eating them with his “Baba and Ta”! I love them all and they love me.

Isn’t this what happiness is? Perhaps. But I see in this inventory something more solid, more permanent than happiness: a sense of fulfilment, deep satisfaction, harmony with others and myself. I am connected to others, some who care for me as I care for them, and a select few who love me as I love them.

Taken together, these apparently simple pleasures; not a new smartphone, computer, television or car- offer me the chance to feel a sense of personal (not financial!) worth, to feel that I am living a meaningful life as well as I can today, and that tomorrow I will try to do it again.

Will this be how I always feel? We all know too well that life throws us downs as well as ups and one phone call from my doctor could see me in despair. And when bad news does arrive, as it inevitability will, I hope that I have the inner strength and support from others to see it through. But all I, we have is today, right now, and it is today that concerns me.

This was my life inventory. Take your own. You too may be surprised to find you aren’t just happy, but something much more.

What is your daily pursuit of happiness?