Relationships

Chivalry furore: Man who billed woman for failed date sparks debate

Apr 17, 2018

Men traditionally tend to pay for a first date - but many don't agree it's right. Source: Pexels.

It’s a decades-old tradition, still honoured by many new couples, that men pay for the first date, but one disgruntled man has sparked debate over whether it’s fair to expect men to stump up the cash if they’re later rejected.

When American woman Amanda Burnett decided to ignore a text message from a man she enjoyed a dinner date with, she ended up paying the price. Rather than leaving the failed date there, he sent her an invoice for their night together – including an admin fee, The Sun reports.

According to the publication, she shared a photo of the document on Twitter. It stated she owed him US$20 (AU$25.69) for bar costs and US$14.50 (AU$18.60) for some pulled pork tacos.

In an apparent joke at the end, the unnamed man then added a US$1.99 “processing fee”, plus sales tax of US$2.56 and a shipping and handling fee of US$0.47 – bringing the grand total to US$39.52.

The site reports she initially refused to pay the fee, and he responded that she had to, in order to “avoid an additional penalty or fines”.

It has sparked a wider debate over whether it’s fair to expect a man to pay for a date if the woman chooses to end the romance afterwards. Many Twitter users shared anger that she expected him to cough up, when she didn’t even respond to him to let him down politely. However, others said he was out of line to demand her attention.

An angry Twitter user wrote: “Pay for your own meal if you don’t have the decency to tell him things aren’t working.”

“If you don’t have the decency to text the guy back he’s in every right to make you pay for the meal. Only fair! So many girls just expect the guy to pay for everything,” another wrote.

However, that got an angry response from another user, who then claimed the woman had texted her date to say “thank you”, but he had replied at the time with “enjoyed you?”

Another user defended the woman, writing: “I really hate to break this to you, but no one is obligated to do anything after a date. He chose to pay. She later on chose not to pursue it further. These are human interactions, not contractual business exchanges.”

One more Twitter user added: “This is ridiculous. You don’t pay for someone’s meal with strings attached unless you tell them that first.”

While public opinion is divided on the issue, men’s website The Good Men Project says a gentleman should always pay on a first date, and that splitting the bill is never a good idea.