Anniversary gifts: Romantic gesture or a waste of money?

Every couple enjoys the early phases of their relationship, which are often filled with luxurious gifts and expensive dinners, but once you’ve been together for a long time does the desire to shower your partner in gifts die off? That’s the question one wife is asking after noticing her husband’s gift-giving abilities dwindling over the years. 

The anonymous woman took to Gransnet, saying her husband stopped gifting her with presents because he thinks it’s a “waste” of money.

Posting on the online forum she wrote: “Over the years my husband has become increasingly rubbish at presents. When we first met he was such a romantic and would whisk me off on weekends away or buy me really thoughtful gifts for our anniversary or my birthday.”

The woman went on to say that it was her birthday last week, adding: “He didn’t bother with a card or gift because cards are a waste and I don’t need any new things”.

“I’m quite upset and don’t really know how to broach it without sounding demanding? Do you still exchange gifts?” she asked.

While she may not be happy with her husband’s lack of gifts, she’s certainly not the only wife celebrating her birthday empty handed. Many couples find that after years of sharing a home, the desire to shower each other with presents has all but disappeared. 

It’s a trend seen across many special occasions, from anniversaries to birthdays, and even Valentine’s Day – the ultimate gift fest for loved-up sweethearts. 

In fact, almost 65 per cent of Australians in a relationship had no plans to celebrate Valentine’s Day this year, according to Finder research. And the older the couple the less money they spent: Those aged 50-64 only spent AU$30 on their beloved, while those in the 16-41 age bracket forked out a respectable $86.

It’s a trend reflected in many of the replies to the woman’s post in Gransnet, with many readers admitting they’ve “stopped exchanging presents” as well. 

One user wrote: “It was my birthday last week too. I didn’t expect a gift – we don’t do that any more. We went out for a meal, that is the only thing we do these days. The idea of sulking about the absence of a gift, seems rather childish to me.”

Another added: “We gave up giving gifts for birthdays or christmas many years back. My OH [other half] has no imagination at all, gave some rubbish presents so in the end I said don’t bother.”

And a third wrote: “We’ve only recently stopped exchanging presents unless inspiration strikes, but I’d be very narked if I didn’t get a card and a meal or a trip out.”

However, for some, gifting each other was still a romantic gesture. One reader wrote: “I always get a lovely card and quite often a present — his cards tend to be romantic whereas the ones I send him are funny.”

Another added: “My husband and I always buy each other birthday presents and cards, he’s better at buying presents than me.”

What do you think? Are gifts a romantic gesture or a waste of money? Do you still give your wife/husband gifts?