Daily Joke: Two women are sitting on the verandah smoking cigarettes

Nov 23, 2021
The two women had been seated on the verandah. Source: Getty Images

Two women are sitting on the verandah smoking cigarettes. As they are smoking, it begins to rain. The first woman’s cigarette gets wet and goes out. As she looks at her friend, she sees something fascinating unfold.

Her friend pulls a condom and a pair of small sewing scissors out of her pocket. She unrolls the condom, cuts off the end and slips it over her cigarette, like a tiny raincoat, and continues smoking.

“Why Mavis!” the first lady exclaims, “where on earth did you get that?”

“Oh just at the pharmacy down the road, Doris, I pick a few up every time the forecast says it might rain. I do hate to waste a perfectly good Marlboro.”

The next day, Doris checks the forecast and thinks it might be a good idea to get herself a few condoms for her cigarettes as well. When she arrives at the pharmacy and is standing in front of the shelf of condoms, she realises she doesn’t know what size she needs as she smokes a different brand of a cigarette than Mavis’s Marlboros.

A staff member sees the old woman staring thoughtfully at the shelf and goes to ask her if she needs any assistance.

“Is there a particular brand you’re looking to buy?” he says.

“Oh, I don’t mind which brand,” says Doris. “Just as long as it fits a Camel.”

Need another laugh? Have a look at some of our other great jokes here.

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