Daily Joke: Dave tells his boss that he knows everyone

Feb 09, 2021
So Dave and his boss flew to Hollywood and knocked on Tom Cruise's door. Source: Pexles.

Dave was bragging to his boss one day, “You know, I know everyone there is to know. Just name someone, anyone, and I know them.”

Tired of his boasting, his boss calls his bluff, “Okay Dave, how about Tom Cruise?”

“No dramas boss, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it.” So Dave and his boss fly to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise’s door.

Tom Cruise shouts, “Dave! What’s happening? Great to see you! Come on in for a beer!”

Although impressed, Dave’s boss is still sceptical. After they leave Cruise’s house, he tells Dave that he thinks him knowing Cruise was just lucky.

“No, no, just name anyone else,” Dave says.

“The US President,” his boss quickly retorts.

“Yup,” Dave says, “Old buddies. Let’s fly to Washington.” And off they go.

At the White House, the President spots Dave on the tour and motions him and his boss over, saying, “Dave, what a surprise, I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let’s have a beer first and catch up.”

Well, the boss is very shaken by now but still not totally convinced. After they leave the White House grounds he expresses his doubts to Dave, who again implores him to name anyone else.

“The Pope!” his boss replies.

“Sure!” says Dave. “I’ve known the Pope for years.” So off they fly to Rome.

Dave and his boss are assembled with the masses at the Vatican’s St. Peter’s Square when Dave says, “This will never work. I can’t catch the Pope’s eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards, so let me just go upstairs and I’ll come out on the balcony with the Pope.” He disappears into the crowd, headed towards the Vatican.

Sure enough, half an hour later, Dave emerges with the Pope on the balcony.

By the time Dave returns, he finds that his boss has had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics.

Making his way to his boss’ side, Dave asks him, “What happened?”

His boss looks up and says, “It was the final straw… you and the Pope came out on to the balcony and the man next to me said, ‘Who is that on the balcony with Dave?'”

Need another laugh? Have a look at some of our other great jokes here.

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