A man enters a barbershop for a shave. While the barber is foaming him up, he mentions the problems he has getting a close shave around the cheeks.
“I have just the thing,” says the barber taking a small wooden ball from a nearby drawer. “Just place this between your cheek and gum.”
The client places the ball in his mouth and the barber proceeds with the closest shave the man has ever experienced.
After a few strokes, the client asks in garbled speech: “And what if I swallow it?”
“No problem,” says the barber. “Just bring it back tomorrow like everyone else does.”
An elderly patient went to the doctor.
“I need your help, Doctor,” he said. “Do you remember those voices in my head which I’ve been complaining about for years?”
“Well, they’ve suddenly stopped.”
“That’s good. So what’s the problem?”
“I think I might be going deaf.”
Three friends stranded on a deserted island find a magic lamp. Inside it is a genie who agrees to grant each friend one wish.
“I want to go home,” says the first friend. The genie grants her wish.
“I want to go home, too,” says the second friend. And the genie sends her back home.
“I’m lonely,” says the third friend. “I sure wish my friends were back here.”