Daily Joke: Harry desperately prays every week

Harry desperately prays to God. He says: “God, please let me win the lottery.”

A week passes. Nothing happens, so he prays again.

“God, please let me win the lottery.”

Again, nothing.

“God, please let me win the lottery.”

After a couple weeks of this, he prays once more.

“God, please let me win the lottery.” Suddenly, he hears a voice from the heavens.

“Harry, would you kindly go and buy a lottery ticket?”

Daily Joke: Two kids were playing on the lawn

Two kids were playing on the lawn when one asked the other: “Hey, do you know how to ride a bicycle without the training wheels yet?”

“No, I dunno,” the other kid shrugged. “You?”

“Nope, I dunno either.”

Their elder neighbour, who was watching them while watering her flowers, stopped what she was doing and approached them: “Hey kids, just for you to know, it’s quite slack English to say ‘dunno’.”

“Well what should we say then?” both kids asked.

“I don’t know,” she replied.

“Well, if you don’t know either then why are you correcting us in first place?” the first kid asked.

Daily Joke: A man and his wife went on vacation to Jerusalem

A man and his wife went on vacation to Jerusalem. While they were there the wife tragically passed away. The undertaker told the husband: “You can have her shipped home for $5,000, or you can bury her here, in the Holy Land, for $150.” The man thought about it and told him he would just have her shipped home.

The undertaker asked: “Why would you spend $5,000 to ship your wife home, when it would be wonderful to be buried here and you would spend only $150?”

The man replied: “Long ago a man died here, was buried here, and three days later he rose from the dead. I just can’t take that chance.”