Few comedy duos are as fondly remembered as Eric Morecambe and Ernie Wise. With their quick wit, perfectly timed banter and gentle self-mockery, they became household favourites – and for many of us, a treasured part of Saturday night television.
These six classic Morecambe and Wise jokes capture the humour that made them so loved: playful, clever and never unkind. Proof that great comedy doesn’t need to be loud or crude – it just needs heart.
Eric: “What’s on the television?” Ernie: “A fruit bowl and an ashtray.”
“I always take my wife morning tea in my pyjamas, but is she grateful? No. She says she’d rather have it in a cup.”
“My neighbour asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him of course he could, so long as he didn’t take it out of my garden.”
“I get airsick just licking an airmail stamp.”
“I used to play football in my youth. Then my eyes went bad. That’s why I became a referee.”
Eric: “We’ve got a fella who’s going to come on in a few minutes’ time. He’s really clever because he swallows a four-foot sword.”
Ernie: “What’s clever about that?” Eric: “He’s only three foot tall.”
Proudly Australian owned and operated