One great thing about getting older is the fact that certain things finally make sense. When I was younger, so many things were so confusing.
Not now. For example:
If you wait long enough, a scar will look like a wrinkle.
Nobody cares if you wear your pajamas when you take out the trash.
Five minutes after meeting someone you will probably forget their name.
Snoring proves your partner is still alive.
It’s OK to forget what day of the week it is.
If you want spam, sign a petition.
Cataract surgery is probably in your future.
It’s OK to stop sending your grandchildren money if they never send you a thank you card.
Your neighbors are probably talking about you right now.
Most people don’t get along with their mother-in-law.
Smoking a joint didn’t always lead to harder drugs.
Sometimes it’s not just gas.
There is usually one sibling who doesn’t like you.
Most managers are secretly disliked.
Walking away is sometimes the best way to win an argument.
You don’t owe your children an inheritance.
Not many people care what you did before you retired.
Most movies are a disappointment after reading the book.
Who remembers the Palmer method?
Playing kickball is a great snapshot of corporate life.
Your parents knew more than you gave them credit for.
Mobile phones contribute to a multitude of health problems.
You’re not as interesting as you think you are.
Nobody is right 100 per cent of the time.
Talking to yourself can often solve many problems.
Most men secretly don’t want women to join their clubs.
If your dog won’t eat it, it’s probably inedible.
The listening skills of most people wane after six months of being together.
Contour sheets should stop being manufactured.
A nap may eliminate all problems for a period of time.
Does the Dewey decimal system matter anymore?
Laughter is the best medicine.
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