Daily Joke: The funniest marriage advice you’ll hear today

I once asked a friend how he and his spouse managed to maintain a happy marriage for 52 years, and he told me, “We never go to bed angry.”

I thought it was a great idea and said, “I should try that too.”

“Yes,” he replied.

“The longest we’ve been awake so far is five days.”

PS: If you missed yesterday’s joke, you can catch it here.

A man walked into a doctor’s office and the receptionist asked him what he had. He replied: “Shingles.”

So she wrote down his name, address and phone number and told him to have a seat.

Fifteen minutes later a nurse came out and asked the man what he had. The man said: “Shingles.”

So she wrote down his height, weight, a complete medical history and told him to wait in the examining room.

A half hour later a nurse came in and asked him what he had. The man said: “Shingles.”

So the nurse gave him a blood test, a blood pressure test, an electrocardiogram, and told him to take off all his clothes and wait for the doctor.

An hour later the doctor came in and found the man sitting patiently in the nude and asked him what he had.

The man said: “Shingles.”

The doctor asked: “Where are they?”

The man answered: “Outside on the truck. Where do you want me to unload them?”