Workplaces can always use a bit of humour – the kind that lightens the mood without crossing any lines. Whether it’s over morning coffee, at a team meeting or during a lunch break, a well-timed joke can bring people together. These five jokes are clean, relatable and guaranteed to be safe for the office – no awkward silences, no follow-up meetings with HR, just good-natured laughs.
Two antennas decided to get married, the ceremony was pretty boring, but the reception was great!
Phil walks into his boss’s office one day and says, “Sir, I’ll be honest with you. I know the economy isn’t great, but I’ve got three companies after me, and I’d like to ask for a raise, respectfully.” After a few minutes of haggling, the boss finally agrees to give him a 5 percent raise, and he happily gets up to leave. “By the way,” the boss asks as Phil leaves his office, “which three companies are after you?” Phil replies, “The electric company, water company, and phone company.”
Do you know what they say about a clean desk? It’s a sure sign of a cluttered desk drawer.
A man walks into a bar, and it’s empty – it’s just him and the bartender. He sits down and orders a drink. He hears someone whisper, “Pssst…I like your tie.” The man looks around but doesn’t see anyone. “Pssst…that color looks nice on you.” He asks the bartender, “Excuse me, but…are you speaking to me?” The bartender rolls his eyes and says, “No, sorry about that. It’s the peanuts… they’re complimentary.”
Teacher: “Anyone who thinks he’s stupid may stand up!” *Nobody stands up* Teacher: “I’m sure there are some stupid students here!” *Little Johnny stands up* Teacher: “Ohh, Johnny, you think you’re stupid?” Little Johnny: “No, I just feel bad that you’re standing alone.”
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