Woman seeks advice after mother-in-law redecorates without her permission

Of all the relationships in family life, the one between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is often the most testing. While most parents have the best intentions, it seems that some just can’t help meddling where they’d be best to stay out of it.

One frustrated daughter-in-law has sparked debate after revealing her mother-in-law randomly repainted her kitchen while she was in hospital.

Taking to online forum Gransnet, she wrote: “Have been stuck in hospital all weekend (More pregnancy complications. Baby is fine). ILs [in-laws] came down to help DH [darling husband] with the children yesterday. More than fair enough, he never has them on his own and needed help.”

She said the babies were left unfed for six hours, while her husband’s mother repainted her kitchen, before adding she had no plans to redecorate her kitchen until next year.

“I’ve been sent photos where the inside of my kitchen cupboards has been glossed white and my walls are now magnolia? I hate magnolia as DH knows well,” she added.

“Also… it’s my house, should I not at least be consulted on whether or not it gets decorated? I really enjoy decorating and now the relatively recent decoration of the previous owners which was nice has been replaced by budget magnolia? I’m flabbergasted, AIBU [am I being unreasonable]? This seems so weird!” She said.

Read more: ‘Dragon’ Grandma gets grandson christened behind new mum’s back

Readers were quick to reply, reassuring the woman she wasn’t being unreasonable. “You’re a better person than me. I’d be incandescent with rage about that and especially not giving the wee ones some food,” one commentator wrote.

Another added: “I think your MIL has the cheek of the devil, muffin! I’d be mad as hell. But even more puzzling is your DH not just stopping her.”

And a third wrote: “I have a young relative whose first MIL used to go in and re-arrange the furniture when she was at work.”

However one user asked, since she was planning to update the kitchen in the near future, should it make any difference? “Odd thing to do, but since you were intending to update the kitchen next year it doesn’t make any difference, does it?”

Read more: ‘My MIL turns up to our house whenever she likes’

There have been plenty of stories in the past about mothers-in-law and their offspring’s partners fighting it out for love and attention, and the touchy subject was even immortalised on screen by Jane Fonda and Jennifer Lopez in their 2005 film, Monster-in-law.

More often than not though, the mother-in-law is painted as an overbearing figure who can’t help but meddle in their child’s life, even when they’re just trying help.

What would you do in this situation? Would this annoy you?

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