Spending the holidays with the grandchildren is meant to be a great bonding experience for both grandparents and their grandkids, but one grandmother has been left with a bitter taste in her mouth after her family came to visit on a recent holiday.
Taking to grandparenting forum Gransnet, the woman, only known by her screen name of Silverlining47, detailed how horrified she was by the behaviour of her grandchildren, aged six and eight. Their parents joined the family for a holiday which left the gran feeling exhausted.
While she acknowledged that she loved her family dearly and they helped while visiting her for two weeks, she was put off by her grandkids’ behaviour.
“The children aged 6 and 8, who are bright and happy and lovely individually were very disobedient, constantly demanding and disruptive,” she wrote. “The parents veered between total indulgence and angry outbursts some of which the children ignored and at other times got very upset.”
She described mealtimes with her grandchildren as “ridiculous”, noting that the kids would run around while eating their food. She also said that venturing out to restaurants for meals was a nightmare.
“I am usually very tolerant and probably bought my own children up in a relaxed way but I found this really very tiring and quite upsetting,” she wrote. “I only see them twice a year and this is their annual holiday with granny, guaranteed sunshine and swimming pool, so lots of fun.”
The woman said she didn’t feel it was her place to pull the kids up for their poor behaviour, unless they were doing something very dangerous or naughty. She also explained that her son and daughter-in-law are known to argue in front of the children, which was something that concerned her.
“Altogether it is exhausting. Surely this can’t be right?”
Other grandparents were quick to offer their thoughts on the matter.
One person wrote: “Hopefully the children will be calmer on their next visit, it doesn’t help when parents are disagreeing either. I usually find the children behave better if I can take them off on my own.”
Another said: “Can’t add much except that surely it is not too much to insist (nicely) on Granny’s House, Granny’s House rules? To be negotiated with their parents if necessary, but I have found before now that they will try to get away with more if they think each won’t enforce normal discipline.”
A third added: “It is probably hard for the parents and the children too being in an unfamiliar environment. I find it usually takes a few days for us all to get used to each other and for the children to get used to being somewhere else. I think it is quite normal for them to be unsettled, over excited and probably overtired in somewhere new, and seeing their grandparents again probably after looking forward to it for a long time.”