Gran’s heartbreak: ‘I never see my grown-up grandchildren’

One gran has been left heartbroken after revealing that she barely sees her grandchildren now that they are grown-up and leading their own lives.

The anonymous woman shared her troubles online and said that her grandchildren, who are now adults and focused on pursuing their own careers, are never around, before admitting that she also rarely sees her son anymore as he is “enjoying his new found freedom”.

Writing on online forum Gransnet, she revealed she has “almost no contact” with them, and said: “Like most grandparents given the chance, I was hands on and part of grandchildren’s lives. Now they are grown up and working, I never get to see them.

“I text and send messages, my son and wife enjoying their new found freedom quite rightly out and about. Son phones a lot but it is not the same as being with them. Tried everything to meet up but it doesn’t work. Am I being unrealistic because I know really there is nothing I can do to make any of them want to meet up?”

Read more: Overlooked gran: ‘I feel ignored by my family’.

The upsetting post seemed to ring true for many readers who also shared their own experiences in support of the disheartened grandmother. One user replied: “I know exactly what you mean. As long as I know they are all ok I am fine with not always seeing them on a regular basis.

“They all lead busy lives, work peculiar hours and have things to catch up on due to both parents working full time so i think that any free time they do have is so precious i don’t want to take it up with an unnecessary visits just so I can say I see my family on a regular basis. I am just happy they are getting on with their lives.”

Read more: What do you owe your grandchildren in life?

Another said: “I think we just have to accept life as it is and be prepared to be on the periphery a bit now. Job done – time to do some of the things we had no time for.”

While one user suggested that the gran may simply have to “get used to” the new situation, writing: “If your son and his wife are enjoying their freedom, and not interested in having family get-togethers, you might have to get used to this situation. If your son and the grandchildren are not interested in changing this, I guess you have to accept things as they are. Let them know that you’d enjoy a met- up but don’t make a martyr of yourself.”

What do you think? Is it expected that you will see less of your grandchildren once they are grown up?