‘Feeling taken for granted by my kids’: Gran’s relatable message

It’s a sad reality faced by many parents across the country: their kids grow up and seem to forget their parents’ existence.

While most parents understand that their adult children have busy lives with jobs and often kids of their own to care for, there are countless stories out there about over-60s who feel somewhat forgotten by their kids.

One grandmother who is living through this pain took to online forum Gransnet to share her story, revealing she was hurt after both her son and daughter forgot her birthday this year.

“Last year my son forgot my birthday,” she wrote. “His marriage had just broken up so I let it go. This year, he’s forgotten again.

“To make matters worse, my daughter has also forgotten. She’s away at the moment for her job, and I’m looking after my DGS [darling grandson].”

While her children could perhaps of been forgiven if they lived interstate and didn’t have their mother’s presence and birthday at the forefront of their minds, it turns out the heartbroken gran is an integral part of their lives and regularly helps them out with childcare and financial aid.

“I help both my AC [adult children] with my DGS and DGD [darling granddaughter],” the grandmother wrote. “I help pay for clothes, trips, have helped pay for holidays etc and ask for nothing in return. To be forgotten on my birthday has upset me very much. Am I being over sensitive?”

She added that she’s been “feeling a bit taken for granted lately” and that it feels like the more she does the more is expected of her, and the less thanks she gets.

Her message was met with dozens of responses from other parents of adult children, who said she was right to feel so upset.

“No, it’s very thoughtless of them and most people would feel at least disappointed to be taken for granted in this way,” one woman wrote.

“I too would feel exactly like you – no excuse to forget mum’s birthday at all. I’m sure once they realise what they have done and how you feel about it they will feel bad. Wonder how they would feel if you forget their birthdays!” added another.

Many responders also aired their disappointment in their own children for not bothering to send even a birthday card, let alone call and wish them a happy birthday.

“I find that my children do not send cards any more to anyone, seems like the custom is dying out,” one woman wrote. “I think though that a card is important to our generation and our families should realise that. It shows us that someone cares enough to make that small effort.”

Can you relate to this? Do you ever feel like your kids don’t care enough?