Maggie Smith’s son opens up about the heartbreak of not being there for her final moments

Toby Stephens, son of the late Dame Maggie Smith, has spoken candidly about the heartbreaking experience of not being by her side when she passed away.

Speaking to The Sunday Times, Toby shared that his mother’s passing came while he was working on his latest project Marama, and he was unable to be with her during those final moments.

“She was in hospital, she was supposed to be coming out but the last two years of her life had been a decline: she would get worse, then she would get better, then she would get worse,” he said.

“So I said, ‘Look I’ve got this film’, and before I could even ask her, she said, ‘Go do it. God, you don’t want to hang round here, I’m fine.'”

Tragically, Smith passed away when Toby was out of the country, something he found “very difficult”, especially as he couldn’t be there alongside his brother during their mother’s final moments

“I was so sad not to be with him, I found that very difficult, but she was no longer aware – and it allowed me some space to actually get my head round what had happened,” Toby said.

Toby’s reflections on his mother’s passing come after friends and family bid a “beautiful goodbye” to Smith, reflecting on the remarkable life of the beloved Harry Potter and Downton Abbey star as they laid her to rest.

On Monday, November 4, those close to Smith gathered at Mortlake Crematorium to say their final goodbyes in a ceremony described by guests as “full of love” and filled with “brilliant eulogies”.

“Such a beautiful goodbye to Maggie Smith today,” one guest said, as per the Daily Mail.

“It was warm and funny and full of love and brilliant eulogies, with the best hymns [being] belted out by all.

“It was poignant but not sad because hers was a life so richly lived.

“Maggie was as funny and sharp as it gets. One of the greats.”

Born December 28, 1934, Smith’s career began in 1952 as a student performer at the Oxford Playhouse, before making her professional debut on Broadway in New Faces of ’56. Over the years, she rose to prominence alongside Dame Judi Dench, becoming a pillar of British theatre, with notable performances for the National Theatre and the Royal Shakespeare Company.

Smith’s Broadway career was equally remarkable, earning Tony Award nominations for her roles in Private Lives (1975) and Night and Day (1979). In 1990, she took home the Tony Award for Best Actress in a Play for her performance in Lettice and Lovage.

On screen, Smith garnered two Academy Awards: Best Actress for The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie (1969) and Best Supporting Actress for California Suite (1978). She received Oscar nominations for other standout performances in Othello (1965), Travels with My Aunt (1972), A Room with a View (1985), and Gosford Park (2001). Smith also became a beloved figure among younger audiences with her portrayal of Professor Minerva McGonagall in the Harry Potter series (2001–2011).

Her versatile talent shone through in films like Death on the Nile (1978), Sister Act (1992), The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel (2012), and The Lady in the Van (2015). However, it was her role as Violet Crawley in Downton Abbey (2010–2015) that earned her widespread international acclaim and three Primetime Emmy Awards.

Throughout her career, Smith was honoured with numerous accolades, including a British Film Institute Fellowship (1993), a BAFTA Fellowship (1996), and the Society of London Theatre Special Award (2010). She was also made a dame in 1990 for her services to the arts by the late Queen Elizabeth.