For my first submission to this amazing site, choosing the topic was the hardest part.
My DVDs cover the whole gamut of tips, tricks and traps of interest to Grey Nomads (but you don’t have to be grey). For example: 12 volt stuff, getting good TV reception (antennas & boosters – why some are better than others), house-sitting tips, optimising your cupboards, the latest hitches and how to use them, neat gizmos and gadgets to amuse us, fishing tips, photography, communications, taking a dinghy, how to handle truckies, confined-space cooking and heaps more.
So, I threw a dart, and it landed on truckies!
I’ll never forget my first encounter with a road train driver, as we headed north in our shiny new caravan. There it was, in my rear view mirror, getting bigger and bigger, until it was right up my proverbial clacker. On a gently winding road with no long straights, he was still there 5 minutes later. I was getting nervous.
Now, being a considerate bloke, I decided to help out. I slowed down and pulled over to the left a bit. He slowed behind me and didn’t come past. More rattled than ever, I pulled back out and got up to speed again. Several kilometres later, a roadhouse appeared, into which I steered with great relief. As I stopped, however, he was still there in my mirror, stopping behind me, getting out and walking to my door. I locked the door! And left the window open a tiny crack.
“It’s OK mate,” he said. “I won’t hurt you, I just want a little chat.”
I got out and faced him. Seven feet tall, six feet wide, all muscles and tattoos. And hairy.
“Yes?” I squeaked.
“You’re new at this towing thing aren’t you?”
“Yes,” I trembled.
Well, listen mate. I’ve got 150 tonnes of iron ore back there, and you just made me slow it down. Thanks for that. And to make it even worse, you pulled over onto the gravel shoulder and showered my windscreen with rocks. I’m twice as high as you, and can see much further. And I know what my rig can do. So don’t try telling me when it’s safe to overtake, you have no idea. Also, pulling over to the left achieves nothing – I’m so big, I still have to get onto the wrong side to get past you. Anyway, you might even lose control on the soft edge – never, ever leave the bitumen at speed for a truck.”
“Crikey,” I mumbled. “So, what should I do?”
“Nothing. Hold your position and speed. Talk to me on your UHF, that’s always good. When I do get enough space and start to wind her up, still DO NOT BACK OFF – if something comes the other way too soon, I need to be able to bail out. Once I’m alongside, then it’s OK to slow down a bit, especially if I’m running out of road, but still stay on that bitumen. When my rear end clears your roo bar, and you see me glance across to my passenger mirror, a quick flash of your headlights tells me you’re happy for me to cut back in front of you. I’ll thank you by flashing left and right on my indicators.”
“Crumbs, anything else?”
“Yeah, I really hate caravanners who travel in convoy up each other’s bums.”
I thanked him for not decking me, and went and bought a UHF radio. I’ve since found the UHF great for listening to truckies talk about road conditions ahead, what they’re doing on the weekend, etc. It’s added a few new words to my vocabulary too…
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