We’ve labelled our younger generations many things; spoilt, entitled, needy, dependent, lazy, uninspired… And the list goes on. However, have we contemplated the possibility that as grandparents, we may have contributed to these attitudes of younger generations?
As grandparents, we pride our selves on our grandchildren, and more importantly, out ability to indulge and spoil them. We are waiting with lollies in the car and a freshly baked cake at home. We have gifts on arrival and we say ‘yes’ when we know it should be ‘no’.
It is a wonderful feeling to spend time doing only the ‘fun things’ after years of hard parenting ourselves. But is our love of spoiling our grandchildren the best thing for them, or are we merely satisfying our own indulgence and shaping poor attitudes and values in our treasured grandchildren?
A survey announced that the top five things grandparents do to spoil their grandchildren are;
1. Giving them foods they aren’t usually allowed to eat (chocolate, cake and lollies)
2. Letting them stay up late, past their usual bed time
3. Letting them watch television shows they aren’t usually allowed to watch
4. Letting them get away with being rude and naughty (and instead considering it ‘cute’ and ‘cheeky’).
GrannyNet suggests that providing children with a relationship that fosters a dependence on being spoilt can have a number of negative ramifications for the development of their values and attitudes.
Children can begin to stop responding to discipline, they are taught to value relationships that benefit them only and they can demand being spoilt. Subsequently, it becomes an expectation rather than a treat, which could have potentially detrimental effects on a grandparent-grandchild relationship in the long term.
With such similar attitude and behavioural themes between these side effects of over-spoiling grandchildren and the younger generations of today, is it possible that we are contributing to shaping all the things we don’t like about the younger generation if we don’t sensibly limit our grandchild indulgence?
So how much is too much? Where should the spoiling grandchildren line be drawn? It could be that we stop giving presents every time we see them. It could be that we need to work within their usual boundaries.
Do you think the way we spoil our grandchildren contributes in shaping their attitudes, as they get older?
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