A pretty young university student visited her professor’s office after class. She glanced down the hall, closed his door and looked at him sweetly.
“I would do anything to pass this exam,” she said. Leaning closer, she whispered seductively, “I mean, I would do anything.”
He looked down at her and said: “You’ll do anything?”
“Anything,” she replied again.
His voice softened. “Anything?” he repeated.
She smiled and again said: “Anything.”
His voice turned to a whisper. “Would you … study?”
Three prisoners are about to be executed. They are asked what they wish to have for their last meal.
The Italian asks for pepperoni pizza, which he is served and then taken away.
The Frenchmen requests a filet mignon, which he is served and also taken away.
The Jewish man requests a plate of strawberries.
The captors are surprised and reply: “Strawberries?”
“Yes, Strawberries.”
“But they are out of season!”
“I’ll wait.”
A policeman was checking up about a robbery in a home. The policeman says to the lady of the house: “This is the messiest room I have ever seen. You should have reported the robbery right away.”
The woman said: “I didn’t know it was a robbery. I thought my husband had been looking for a clean shirt!”