As a couple approaches the altar, the groom tells his wife-to-be: “Honey, I’ve got something to confess: I’m a golf nut, and every chance I get, I’ll be playing golf!”
“Since we’re being honest,” replies the bride, “I have to tell you that I’m a hooker.”
The groom replies: “That’s okay, honey. You just need to learn to keep your head down and your left arm straight.”
A group watched, intrigued, as a lone player played up short of the green they were on. As they teed off on the next hole they noticed him quickly chip on and putt out, before running up to their tee.
Sensing their bewilderment, he said: “Sorry, do you mind if I play through – I’ve just heard that my wife has had a terrible accident and may not make it!”
In the locker room, a man was listening as a group of golfers talked about their game with a pro. Having listened to them talking, he went to the pro and said: “I’ve been playing golf for a long time and thought I knew all the terminology of the game, but what’s a rider?”
The pro said: “A rider is when you hit the ball far enough to actually get in the golf cart and ride to it.”
One fine day, John and Don are out golfing when John slices his ball deep into a wooded ravine. He grabs his 7-iron and proceeds down the embankment into the ravine in search of his ball.
The brush is quite thick, but he searches diligently and suddenly he spots something shiny. As he gets closer, he realises that the shiny object is in fact a 7-iron in the hands of a skeleton lying near an old golf ball.
John excitedly calls out to his golfing partner: “Hey Don, come here. I’ve got some real trouble down here.”
Don comes running over to the edge of the ravine and calls out: “What’s the matter, John? Is everything okay?”
John shouts back in a nervous voice: “Throw me my 8-iron! Apparently you can’t get out of here with a seven.”