One day, after a man had his annual physical, the doctor came out and said: “You had a great check-up. Is there anything that you’d like to talk about or ask me?”
“Well,” he said. “I was thinking about getting a vasectomy.”
“That’s a pretty big decision. Have you talked it over with your family?”
“Yeah, and they’re in favour 15 to 2.”
It was a disastrous year for the farmers. The snow fell and fell until the government relief agency had to step in and lend a hand.
“It must have been terrible,” said the government man to a farmer. “All that snow.”
“Could have been worse,” calmly answered the farmer. “My neighbour had more snow than me.”
“How’s that?” asked the government man.
“More land,” replied the farmer.
An elderly couple had dinner at another couple’s house and, after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen. The two gentlemen were talking and one said: “Last night we went out to a new restaurant and it was really great. I would recommend it very highly”.
The other man said: “What is the name of the restaurant?”
The first man thought and thought and finally said: “What is the name of that flower you give to someone you love? You know, the one that’s red and has thorns?”
“Do you mean a rose?”
“Yes, that’s the one,” replied the man. He then turned towards the kitchen and yelled: “Rose, what’s the name of that restaurant we went to last night?”