A young woman visits her grandmother, deflated.

“Everyone is getting married – I need to find The One,” said the young woman.

“Describe your perfect man,” said the grandmother.

“The man I marry must be a shining light against the company. He must be musical. Tell jokes. Sing. And stay home at night!” she reeled off.

“Honey,” said grandma, “If that’s all you want, get a TV!”