An old man spent the day in the city. He sat near a group of young men in a restaurant as he enjoyed a fancy lunch.
After he bowed his head to give thanks for his food, one of the young men thought he would embarrass the old gentleman. “Hey, buddy, does everyone do that out where you live?”
The old man calmly replied: “No, son, the pigs don’t!”
A climber fell off a cliff and, as he tumbled down, he caught hold of a small branch wedged in the rock.
“HELP! IS THERE ANYBODY UP THERE?” he shouted.
A majestic voice boomed through the gorge: “I will help you, my son, but first you must have faith in me.”
“Yes, yes, I trust you!” cried the man.
“Let go of the branch,” boomed the voice.
There was a long pause, and the man shouted up again: “IS THERE ANYONE ELSE UP THERE I COULD TALK TO?”
A girl was given a tea set for her second birthday. It became one of her favourite toys and, when her mother went away for a few weeks to care for her sick aunt, the toddler loved to take her father a little cup of tea, which was just water really, while he was engrossed watching the news on TV.
He sipped each “cup of tea” he was brought and lavished generous praise on his daughter, leaving the little girl immensely proud.
Eventually the mother returned home and the father couldn’t wait to show her how his little princess had been looking after him. On cue, the girl took him his “cup of tea” and he sipped it before praising it to the heavens.
The mother watched him drink it and said: “Did it ever occur to you that the only place she can reach to get water is the toilet?”