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Daily Joke: First impressions

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Source: Getty images

There was once a guy who was going on a movie date with a beautiful girl. Before he left, he made the mistake of eating a jumbo can of beans. As soon as he picked her up, he felt the urge to release some gas, but he thought he could hold off until they got to the theatre.

When they arrived, he asked her if she’d like some popcorn and a Coke. She agreed, so he went to the restroom first. However, the line was long, so he decided to head back, get the snacks, and join her in the theatre.

After the movie, he tried the restroom again, only to find another painfully long line. Figuring he could wait until he dropped her off, he held it in and headed to her place.

When they pulled into her driveway, she excitedly announced, “Oh goodie! My grandparents are here. Come on in and meet them!”

Despite his growing discomfort, he agreed and went inside. They sat at the table with her family, and he finally couldn’t hold it in any longer. Trying to be discreet, he aimed a quiet, toxic release towards the family’s hound dog, Duke, hoping they’d blame the poor pooch for the smell. Her father immediately stood up, shouted “Duke!” and sat back down.

Relieved they thought it was the dog, he felt emboldened and released a couple more, each louder and stronger. Her father, once again, stood up, called “Duke!!” and sat back down.

Finally, he let it all out with a thunderous, hair-curling fart that echoed through the dining room. Her father jumped up one last time and shouted, “Duke, get the hell out from under him before he craps on you!”

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