Well now. Isn’t it refreshing to hear a woman over 60 boldly declare she still loves sex?

Let’s start with this: you’re not broken, you’re not weird, and you’re certainly not alone. You’re a fully functioning, sensual adult woman who happens to be 64 and still wants a bit of the good stuff. If that’s shocking to anyone, they can feel free to close this tab and go back to knitting smugly in silence.

But for the rest of us who know that libido doesn’t magically vanish at menopause like a fairy godmother waving her wand (more’s the pity), let’s talk about the real problem here: how to actually get some.

You’ve said you’re social, you go out, but no one’s hitting on you. I hear this all the time, and frankly, it’s a common lament in the post-60 dating world. Age brings wisdom, resilience, and freedom – but for some reason, it also seems to bring a kind of social invisibility, particularly for women. The blokes your age often want someone 15 years younger (good luck to them), and many of them also carry their own insecurities about ageing bodies, performance, and, heaven forbid, their cholesterol.

So, short of tapping a stranger on the shoulder and asking, “Fancy a roll in the hay?”, what are your options?

1. The Buddy System – Bonk Edition

One option that many mature women consider – often more in theory than in practice – is the friends-with-benefits model. It’s not revolutionary, but it’s certainly effective when handled with care and mutual respect. Do you have a trusted male friend, single, of course, who might also be feeling a little … under-cuddled?

This doesn’t have to be complicated or awkward if you approach it gently. An honest conversation over a glass of wine can do wonders: “Hey, we’re both single, we both enjoy each other’s company  – any interest in adding some adult recreation to the mix?” You may be surprised by how many men are just as lonely, just as affectionate, and just as worried about crossing lines.

Of course, ground rules matter: no jealousy, no expectations, and total honesty if either party meets someone else. It’s not for everyone, but if done right, it can be joyful, safe, and deeply comforting.

2. The Sex Worker Option — Inspired by Emma Thompson

Now this one often gets raised eyebrows, but let’s keep them lowered, shall we?

If you’ve seen the film Good Luck to You, Leo Grande, you’ll know exactly what I mean. Emma Thompson plays a widowed woman in her 60s who hires a young male sex worker to explore the physical intimacy and confidence she missed out on earlier in life. What follows is not just a steamy encounter, but a surprisingly emotional, affirming journey of rediscovery.

There’s absolutely no shame in hiring a professional. In fact, there’s something wonderfully empowering about a woman deciding, “I want to feel good in my body again,” and paying for the privilege. You know what you’re getting, you’re in control, and – bonus – no small talk about their ex-wife or footy team.

Sex work is legal in many parts of Australia, and there are reputable agencies that provide services specifically for older women seeking connection, not just a quickie in a hotel. It’s worth doing some research, reading reviews, and being clear about your boundaries and expectations. This is your experience – you get to call the shots.

3. Modern Dating (Yes, Even for Us)

If you haven’t dipped a toe into online dating, it’s not too late – just wear good boots.

There are now apps and websites tailored for the over-50s crowd (think: SilverSingles, Lumen, or even classic RSVP). Yes, it can be exhausting. Yes, there are still weirdos and scammers (block early, block often). But it’s also where a huge chunk of single people are now meeting. Make your intentions clear in your profile: looking for companionship, chemistry – and maybe more.

The key is to reframe dating not as “finding The One,” but as exploring possibilities. Chat, flirt, meet for coffee. If there’s a spark, great. If not, you’ve had a cappuccino and reminded yourself you’re still a catch.

4. Solo doesn’t mean settling

Lastly, let’s not forget the wonderful, lifelong lover you already have: you.

Self-pleasure is not just for teenagers and lonely sailors. It’s a healthy, natural, and deeply satisfying way to stay in tune with your desires. There are whole online communities and boutique stores that cater to older women exploring their sexuality solo, with everything from elegant toys to sensual literature. You deserve pleasure, whether someone’s giving it to you or not.

Final Thoughts

The pursuit of sex after 60 is not just about the act – it’s about intimacy, self-worth, joy, and a sense of being alive. You don’t have to give it up just because you’ve crossed some invisible age line. You just have to get creative, be bold, and let go of the idea that desire has an expiry date.

And no – you don’t have to ask a stranger in Coles if he’s interested in a quickie in the veg aisle. Unless he’s standing in front of the cucumbers smiling at you … then maybe.

Go get ’em, tiger.