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Buckle up: the car jokes that will have you laughing all the way to the garage

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The two old ladies were out enjoying a casual drive. Source: Getty Images

Whether you’re stuck in traffic, overdue for a service or still not quite sure what to do in a roundabout, these six car jokes are guaranteed to make the journey a little more enjoyable. Proceed with caution – groaning is perfectly normal.

Ditzy friend to another: “I failed the driving test. I entered the traffic circle and the sign said ’30 mph’ so I drove 30 times around.”
The other friend responds sympathetically, “You probably counted wrong.”

Q: Why should you always carry peanut butter in your car? A: In case there’s a traffic jam.

Q: Why did the man throw his spare tyre into the woods when he got lost? A: Where there’s a wheel, there’s a way.

Q: What did you do with all those old car batteries? A: I gave them away, free of charge.

People laugh at my car because it’s ugly and green. But at least I avocado.

I renewed my car insurance over the phone today, and as I was about to hang up the woman on the other end asked if I had a pet. I said, “Yes, I’ve got a dog.” She asked, “Would you like to insure him too?” I said, “No thanks, he can’t drive!”

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