When I was younger, it seemed like seniors always sent me jokes. I don’t know why, because I found it annoying. Why couldn’t they send me a simple email with some relevance? So many jokes day after day after day. Ugh.
And now, I’m doing the same thing. I guess some call them “dad jokes”. Perhaps it’s an easy way for people to communicate without having to engage personally. For seniors, maybe they are a reprieve from the grind of getting older by combating the aging process with humor?
According to Wikipedia, a dad joke is a wholesome joke often told by fathers that includes a snappy punchline or a predictable pun or play on words. It is deemed to be endearingly corny or unfunny.
Here are a few I’ve created. Get ready for a pun time!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A bad bouncer.
I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. I’ll drop it off once I’m finished with it.
What did the Roomba say when it hit the wall? I feel cornered!
• I asked my date to meet me at the gym, but he never showed up. I guess the two of us aren’t going to work out.
• The difference between a numerator and a denominator is a short line. Only a fraction of people will understand this, and their opinions are divided.
• I found a wooden shoe in my toilet today. It was clogged and had no sole.
• I just broke up with my mathematician girlfriend. Boy, did I have her number!
• I can’t take my dog to the pond anymore because the ducks keep attacking him. Maybe I should have fed them quackers?
• To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office, I will find you. You have my Word.
• I used to run a dating service for chickens. But then they became brave and no longer needed me.
• If prisoners could take their own mug shots, they could serve more beer in that joint.
• Have you heard about those new corduroy pillows? People are lining up to buy them.
• If a pig loses its voice…does it hit a “sower” note?
• Wanna hear a joke about paper? It’s a rip-roaring gas!
• A panic-stricken man explained to his doctor, “You have to help me, I think I’m shrinking.” The doctor told him to settle down. “You’ll just have to learn to be a little patient.”
• What is a guitar player’s favorite Italian food? String cheese.
• How does cereal pay its bills? With Chex.
• Have you heard about the restaurant on the moon? Food is fabulous, but it has no atmosphere.
• I don’t trust stairs. They have way too many ups and downs.
• People in Athens rarely get up before sunrise. Dawn is tough on Greece.
• Never try to date a tennis player. Use the net to get a date.
• I used to hate facial hair, but now it’s grown on me..
• I don’t get why bakers aren’t rich. They make so much dough.
• I asked my wife if I was the only one she slept with. She said yes, and suggested sex therapy.
• Can you make a tissue dance? It’s snot easy.
• My wife left me because of my obsession with pasta. So I told her good riddance as she was pasta-her- prime.
• I was playing chess with my friend and he said, “Let’s make this interesting.” So we stopped playing chess.
Do you have an “ear” for corny jokes? Do tell!