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Funny pregnancy jokes: 6 cheeky one-liners about babies, doctors and delivery

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Pregnancy might be full of big moments, nerves and anticipation – but it’s also a time that lends itself to a bit of humour.

From awkward doctor visits to classic one-liners about babies and growing families, these jokes prove that sometimes the best way to handle life’s biggest changes is with a good laugh.

Here are six pregnancy jokes that are guaranteed to deliver.

I’m two months pregnant now. When will my baby move? With any luck, right after he finishes University.

Brenda, pregnant with her first child, was paying a visit to her obstetrician’s office. When the exam was over, she shyly began, “My husband wants me to ask you…” “I know, I know.” the doctor said, placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder, “I get asked that all the time. Sex is fine until late in the pregnancy.” “No, that’s not it at all.” Brenda confessed. “He wants to know if I can still mow the lawn.”

Woman: “Should I have a baby after 35?” Doctor: “No, 35 children is enough.”

Teacher: “Give me a sentence about a public servant.” Student: “The fireman came down the ladder pregnant.” Teacher: “Do you know what pregnant means?” Student: “Yes, it means you’re carrying a child.”

What should a joke have in common with a pregnancy? A good delivery.

What do you call it when you’re unable to find someone to help you through your pregnancy? A midwife crisis.

 

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