Sometimes the best jokes are the shortest ones. Sometimes the setup takes a little longer but the payoff is absolutely worth it. These four cover both ends of the spectrum – from a one-liner that lands in an instant to a neighbourhood surveillance story that builds beautifully to its conclusion. The ham sandwich one might be our favourite. Or maybe the blonde with the vacuum. It’s a close call.

1 It was Christmas and the judge was in a merry mood as he asked the prisoner,”What are you charged with?” “Doing my Christmas shopping early”, replied the defendant. “That’s no offence”, said the judge. “How early were you doing this shopping?” “Before the store opened.”

2 A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. When it was her turn, she rolled the dice and she landed on “Science & Nature”. Her question was, “If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it? She thought for some time and then asked, “Is it on or off?”

3 Bill and Marla decided that the only way to pull off a Sunday afternoon quickie with their 10-year-old son in the apartment was to send him out on the balcony and order him to report on all the neighborhood activities. The boy began his commentary as his parents put their plan into operation. “There’s a car being towed from the parking lot,” he said. “An ambulance just drove by.” A few moments passed. “Looks like the Anderson’s have company,” he called out. “Matt`s riding a new bike and the Coopers are having sex.” Mom and dad shot up in bed. “How do you know that?” the startled father asked. “Their kid is standing out on the balcony too,” his son replied.

4 A ham sandwich walks into a bar. The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve food here.”