As I get older I’ve come to realise the following 10 things:

1. I talk to myself because I sometimes need expert advice.
2. Sometimes I roll my eyes out loud.
3. I don’t need anger management. I need people to use a bit of common sense and stop being so silly.
4. My people skills are just fine. It’s my tolerance for stupidity that might need some work.
5. The biggest lie I tell myself is “I don’t need to write that down, I’ll remember it!”
6. When I was a child I thought nap time was punishment. Now, it’s like a mini-vacation.
7. The day the world runs out of wine is just too terrible to think about.
8. Even duct tape can’t fix silly, but it can muffle the sound.
9. Wouldn’t it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer for 10 minutes; come out wrinkle-free and three sizes smaller?
10. ‘Getting lucky’ means walking into a room and remembering why I am there.