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Confucius Say… Some funny things…

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Confucius lived 551-479 BCE and is one of the most quoted Chinese philosophers and thinkers ever.  Over the generations his words have been so popular that they have been twisted and bent into entertainment. So today we looked for the funniest “Confucius Say” jokes ever… enjoy!

 

Confucius say: “Man who is going bald in front is a great thinker”

 

Confucius say:  “Man who is going bald in back is a great lover”

 

Confucius say:”Man who is going bald in front and back THINKS he’s a great lover”

 

Confucius Say: A 400 pound lady, who likes both men and women, is a bisexual built for two.

 

Confucius Say: Woman who wear something from Victoria’s Secret, have no more secrets.

 

Confucius Say: Man who go round with hole in pocket feel cocky all day!

 

Confucius Says: A relationship is the opportunity to do something you hate with someone you love.

 

Confucius Says: Some Sex Is Good…More Is Better…Too Much Is Just About Right

 

Confucius Say: Man who is Happy all day Is A happy man.

 

Confucius say:  Man who walks through airport turnstile side ways, get to Bangkok.

 

Confucius says: “He who crosses the ocean twice without washing is a dirty double crosser.”

 

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Confucius say:  “If you are in a book store and cannot find the book for which you search, you are obviously in the….. “

 

Confucius say: “Man who eat too many prunes, get good run for money.”

 

Confucius say: “Better to be pissed off than pissed on.”

 

Confucius Say: “The inventor of shag carpet made a big pile.”

Confucius Say:  “A tattoo is permanent proof of temporary insanity.”

 

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Confucius Say:  “An Optimist is a girl who regards a bulge as a curve.”

 

Confucius Say:  “Man who run in front of car get tired.”

 

Confucius Say:  “Baseball is wrong – man with four balls cannot walk.”
Confucius Say:  “War doesn’t determine who is right, war determines who is left.”

 

Confucius Say:  “Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cathouse.”

 

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Confucius Say:  “Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.”

 

 

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